Wednesday, May 02, 2007

Yes, that's right. Jon has forced me to judge another one of his pathetic reality game shows. When will he ever learn? Wasn't the first one embarrassing enough? Oh well, if he had brains he probably wouldn't be an Intergalactic Gladiator.

Monday, May 15, 2006

Alrighty, judging will be fun, but I think I need to give you all a run down on how I work. I'm mean, quite literally a jack ass, that's my persona. No matter how great your post is, I am expected to tear it apart. But I completely expect you all to come right back at me, to give as good as you get.

So that the writer behind Simon can actually give some positive feed back or insight, I will introduce the character of Sofia, Simon's personal assistant.

Do understand that I have read many of your blogs, wish you no ill will and in NO WAY want you to take any of my criticisms to heart. I'm saying it to be mean, nasty, snarky, and to get a reaction. Remember, not all fights are physical. Mine is a verbal engagement, which can be just as painful. If you really want me to lay off, email me, and we'll chat. But the rest of you whiney little twits, grow a pair and tell me what you really think of me.


Saturday, May 13, 2006

Well well, you all seem to be rather curious about me, and who wouldn't be? Not only am I a rather dashing figure, I will hold your fate in my hands. Will you be successful, bathed in the warmth of praise and love? Or will you be a failure, so bad that even the Peace Corps thinks you too pathetic for service?

But before you worry that I'm just going to be mean for the fun of it, take heart. I like quality, love it, in fact. A good fight makes my heart glad. I like a unique approach to things, and a bit of ingenuity never hurt either. But if you suck I will tell you to sod off and stop wasting my time. And never fear, those of you that make my eyes bleed, there will most likely be a judge that praises everyone, no matter how bad they did, and you will wonder greatly about their credibility.

So boys and girls, I wait with baited breath for the games to begin.

Friday, May 12, 2006

Greetings my wonderful little hangers-on. I have been asked to judge Last Gladiator Standing, and in my infinite genius, I have managed to figure out how to get this little job to pay me mountains of money. So I will insult you with impunity, I will insult you on the holonet, live, in front of billions, and with your mama no where around to stick up for her baby.

Are you all up for this? Do you think you can handle the challenge? Well then lets see what you've all got